captions_en.vtt

WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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Ladies and Gentlemen,
well, Gentlemen certainly.

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This is no place for a lady.
[laughter]

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It gives me great pleasure,
and no small amount of relief,

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to declare this, the first ever flushing public
lavatory, open.

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[applause]
[whistling]

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You might want to leave it five minutes.
Oh, oh my goodness

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[other sounds of disgust]
A year previously, in 1851, temporary toilets

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were exhibited
at the Great Exhibition in London's Hyde Park.

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and visitors were charged a penny to use them
and

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that is thought to be the origin of the phrase
"to spend a penny"

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And this is the origin of the Nobel Peace
Prize

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hmph, interesting that that is not what is
supposed to happen...

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Darling I don't want to worry you or anything,
but I think you might be dead!.

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hmph, I don't think so darling.
Well this newspaper seems to think you are

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and it's always been very reliable in the
past.

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Look Dr. Alfred Nobel, the Swedish chemist
and inventor of dynamite

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died yesterday in the French resort of Cannes.
Let me see that.

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Good grief, it does say I'm dead.
Look what they're calling me here,

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the merchant of death, it says here Dr. Alfred
Nobel became rich by finding ways to kill

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more people even faster than ever before.
Honestly, by reading this you'd think that

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just because I invented dynamite I am personally
responsible for the death of thousands of

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people.
I mean honestly.

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Have you ever heard such nonsense?
I said, have you ever heard such rubbish?

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Sophie, if you have something to say...
Well, you did invent what is at this point

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in time the most powerful explosive on earth
and it has gone on to kill thousands and thousands

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of people.
What's your point?

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All I'm saying is that when people hear the
word Nobel people they are always going to

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think of dynamite.
I knew I should have called it Nobel's safety

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powder.
I mean do you really think that when I actually

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do go this is how I'll be remembered?
Oh, sweet heart, of course it is, my fairy-cheeked

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little death merchant.
Well not if I can help it.

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I shall reinvent my own image.
I shall use my massive fortune to establish

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a special prize.
One that rewards positive human endeavors

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in the pursuit of peace.
So when I do die, I won't just be linked to

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explosives.
And I, Alfred Nobel

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will call this special peace prize, prize-o-mite
Darling, why don't you call it the Nobel Peace

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Prize?
[laughter]

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I love you darling, but you have absolutely
no idea when it comes to marketing.

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Tea!
Certainly...